Does Your Career Intimidate Your Man?
Dear Matt & Tamsen,
I think my career as an attorney is difficult for men to deal with. Help!
Being a career woman in a high profile job might intimidate some men. Here’s how to avoid the insecure guy and locate the confident man of your dreams. Downplaying one of the most important parts of your life (your career) in order to avoid intimidating a man is like leaving this season’s hottest cocktail dress in the closet during the holiday party tour. There is only one way to walk down the runway of life, and that is with your best pedi forward and your latest couture blazin’! If you have to camouflage your career successes in order to match the stride of a potential love interest, then you’re running with the wrong guy! A quality man, who is secure with himself, will respect and admire a woman who is more powerful in the work force. In successful relationships, each partner has a chance to be the power-player. It is okay if you rule the boardroom, as long as you allow him to be CEO of the bedroom every now and then!
For more advice on this sometimes crazy and confusing world of dating, check out: AskMattandTamsen.com
He Hasn’t Removed His Online Profile
Dear Matt & Tamsen,
We’ve had a few dates and it’s always a good time. The problem is, he still has his profile up on two dating websites? Can I ask him to take it down?
The goal here is for him to actively take down his profile on his own without you asking, hinting or requesting him to do so. If he does this on his own it will make you feel extremely secure in the relationship. Here are 3 things that you can do to reach this goal.
Don’t dwell on it. Does it really matter that his profile is up when you guys have a great time every time you get together? Where’s your confidence? Remember, a confident girl is a sexy girl.
Just relax. It’s a little early for you to even be thinking about him taking down his profile.
Let him have at it! Let him continue to meet women that absolutely pale in comparison to you. He’ll figure out soon enough that he only wants to be with you.
For more dating and relationship advice from Matt and Tamsen, America’s Love Experts, check out: AskMattandTamsen.com
Are You His Rebound Girlfriend?
The guy I am dating is constantly talking to his ex-girlfriend. I have even met her and she is nice. They both insist they are just friends, but how can I ever be sure?
Here are a few signs his ex has not ex-ited his life:
1. He mentions her often, but tries to make it seem like a natural part of a story or conversation. It’s almost as if she is looming somewhere in the back of his mind and he subconsciously brings her up as much as possible.
2. He answers her calls and texts regularly. This is not a good sign. Usually people who are broken up do not correspond so there might still be something there.
3. He helps her with small boyfriend-like tasks. Most guys dread home improvement jobs with their current girlfriends, let alone an ex. If he is more than willing to still be her handyman, he is not the man for you.
Securing A Second Date: How Do I Do It?
Dear Matt & Tamsen,
I am a queen of first dates, but the second one is always a bit of a problem. I am attractive, in my 30’s and have no children, ex-husbands or pets? I work out and love to cook. What am I doing wrong?
It’s not always easy to figure out if a guy is going to ask you out for a second date.
But, you should never, ever, ever ask him out or suggest that you get together again.
Yes, he asked you out.
Yes, you had a great time.
Yes, he will continue his aggressive chase. WRONG.
When the stakes become greater (he starts to like you), some men take it slower. Men hate to look desperate, vulnerable or sappy (some ridiculous male ego thing), so even if he is dying to ask you out for the following weekend he will most likely wait a few days.
Some ways to know whether to pencil him in or out:
1. Send him a thank-you email on Tuesday regarding the date. Casually mention that you had a great time and look forward to doing it again sometime. This gives him the opportunity to reply.
2. If he doesn’t respond, do not contact him via phone or text.
3. Every time you convince yourself he is not interested, re-read this article, and go to the gym without your Blackberry.
4. If you don’t hear from him before noon Thursday, make other plans.
For more dating and relationship advice from Matt and Tamsen, America’s Love Experts, check out: AskMattandTamsen.com
He Is Becoming Clingy
Dear Matt & Tamsen,
My boyfriend of 3 months is becoming clingy. I need some alone time already! Help!
A: Ugh. Your boyfriend is turning into your “Gal Pal,” and if you don’t do something fast, you are going to be forced to take him to the very next “girl’s night out.” There are a few reasons guys develop the “Gal Pal” syndrome.
1. He may truly enjoy every moment spent basking in your glow.
2. He may like shopping malls and spas (though I really have met very few men who fall into this category).
3. He may be very jealous and not trust you just yet.
Whatever the case, some suggestions to wean him off of your girl’s night outing.
1. It’s still a bit soon to be giving him your hourly schedule. Do what you need to do and then call him to let him know you have time.
2. Let him know that spending too much time together isn’t good for you. Yes, it may be harsh…but better now than later.
3. If it’s a night you have plans, tell him you just want to get all pretty for him or get some things done, and then remind him you will be seeing him later (giving him something to look forward too).
For more dating and relationship advice from Matt and Tamsen, America’s Love Experts, check out: AskMattandTamsen.com
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